"a woman's answer to a man's question"

by lena lathrop

Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing

Ever made by the hand above--
A woman's heart, and a woman's life
And a woman's wonderful love?

Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing
As a child might ask for a toy,
Demanding what others have died to win,
With the reckless dash of a boy?

You have written my lesson of duty out,
Man-like you have questioned me;
Now stand at the bar of my woman's soul
Until I shall question thee.

You require your mutton shall always be hot,
Your socks and your shirt be whole;
I require your heart to be true as God's stars,
And as pure as heaven your soul.

You require a cook for your mutton and beef;
I require a far better thing.
A seamstress you're wanting for socks and shirts;
I look for a man and a king.

A king for the beautiful realm called home,
And a man that the maker, God,
Shall look upon as he did the first
And say, "It is very good."

I am fair and young, but the rose will fade
From my soft, young cheek one day,
Will you love me then 'mid the falling leaves,
As you did 'mid the bloom of May?

Is your heart an ocean so strong and deep,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell
On the day she is made a bride.

I require all things that are grand and true,
All things that a man should be;
If you give all this, I would stake my life
To be all you demand of me.

If you cannot do this -- a laundress and cook
You can hire, with little to pay,
But a woman's heart and a woman's life
Are not to be won that way.

"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman..." --1 Peter 3:7 (ESV)

ladies, DO NOT GIVE UP.

believe in the man that will hold your heart close to his - treasuring it, learning it, guarding it, nurturing it.

believe.

matilda

Sometimes I listen to a specific song I'm craving, sometimes I listen to an artist or band that intrigues me, sometimes I listen to full albums, sometimes I listen to playlists, sometimes I listen to music that matches my mood, and sometimes I skip the preliminaries and just hit "shuffle."

yesterday was one such day.

As I drove down the I75 through Illinois, I had my family in tow, some pringles at my fingertips, head phones in tact, and music going song by song to pass the time.

As if planned by God, three songs came on in consecutive order that changed everything for me. When linked together, they portrayed such a message - I could not ignore it.

Better Days - Goo Goo Dolls

"and the one poor child who saved this world

and there's ten million more who probably could

if we all just stopped and said a prayer for them"

Meant to Live - Switchfoot

"we were meant to live for so much more,

have we lost ourselves?"

Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova

"take this sinking boat and point it home,

we've still got time"

I was suddenly overwhelmed with shame and guilt. I could be doing something notable, something great, something helpful. But I'm not. At least, I wasn't.

It was then that I decided to sponsor a child in an underprivileged country. As soon as I got to a computer, I logged on and chose my little girl.

Her name is MATILDA. She is five years old and she lives in a rural farming community in Ghana, Africa. Matilda loves to sing. By donating a dollar a day, I will provide food, clothes, and education for this precious girl who would otherwise go without.

It's interesting: I find that I hit "shuffle" on my ipod when I'm indifferent, bored, or lazy. As if I have no preference. It makes me feel as though I am shuffling through life - without a preference, without a plan, walking slowly with heavy steps, rather than skipping or dancing through life as it's supposed to be.

But I was convicted -- I am meant to be more that mediocre. And I was reminded -- I still have TIME to DO something. Even if you're not out changing the world, you can still contribute to changing ONE person's world. And isn't that part of making the difference that you long to make? Isn't that a start?

Join today and give a child HOPE.

"happy."

Today was beach day, or in other words, a good day. I finally whipped out my new straw hat, I applied the sun tan lotion, I packed the lunches, grabbed the towels, made the soundtrack, and off we went - me and my boy.

I often have epiphanies on really good days. I think this is because I am able to see things the way my heart longs to see things - purely - without the frustrations of life trying to sabotage my vision. I open myself up and soak in my surroundings in hopes of gaining new perspectives, new inspiration, new cleansing, and new ideas. Today, it was a revelation about the little moments.

For instance, Ben, although anxious to listen to his brand new cd, happily conceded to my showing him my "current top 3 songs that make me close my eyes and just sing." For instance, Ben quickly taking the cooler from me when he looked over to see me carrying it. For instance, Ben laughing/making fun of my weird habits, but laughing that I-actually-like-that-about-you laugh. For instance, kissing on the beach and feeling oh-so One Tree Hill-esque. For instance, simple small talk while laying on our towels in the sun. For instance, falling asleep in the car on the way home...and waking up to find my boyfriend holding my hand. For instance, enjoying Ben's horrified facial expressions when I got him to believe something completely unbelievable. For instance, knowing Ben would order a blooming onion at outback, and being really happy I didn't have to ask for it.

The little moments are the important moments.

In those moments I'm reminded that beyond the affection and the adoration, Ben is my best friend...and we truly have fun together. When discussing this tonight with my dearest Mikayla, she asked me,

"where's your heart, d?"

"happy," I say.

...for that's all that matters.

...that's the most important thing.

in the end, the "timeless romance" that is our dream may just end up being that "faithful friendship" that we always need.

"romance eventually fades. it doesn't raise kids or pay bills. but best friends? they can figure that out." - mikayla nicole :)

dad aka hero

Many people know my dad. Lord knows, we can't run into Target or Martin's without someone waving him down to talk, and we can't go to a restaurant without the owner saying a quick hello. He walks away from each person with a huge grin on his face and explains with confidence, "that was my friend; I have them everywhere."

So yes, many people know my dad, but not near as many people know the man that I know, the man underneath the friendly conversations in the frozen food section or the order of a medium-rare steak with potatoes.

But there is so much more to him.

At the dinner table, he is always the one who goes around the table and says, "tell me about your day."

He gives us advice about our jobs, school, and friends.

No matter how busy he gets, he never fails to schedule dates with my mom.

He stays up way past his bedtime to add animation effects to his high school daughter's powerpoint presentation -- even despite her telling him it's not necessary.

He gets emotional over every single father's day card. You would think after 22 years of being a dad, he would keep in under control.

He gets his hair cut for free, but (despite his hairdresser telling him not to) he leaves a $20 bill every time he's finished - which is more than the price of a men's cut.

At every single one of my high school choir concerts, he would sneak into the auditorium at least an hour early to save seats for the fam. It would always be near the front, and he would always cheer very loudly.

He will never, ever forget to tell you how much he loves you.

On election day, he rearranges his schedule to fit mine and B's so that he can go vote with his girls.

He is passionate about God and people. Which effectively sums up his profession.

He has been offered, three times, to work at the national office in Springfield, MO as the national church planting director. He has turned it down every single time because he loves his church in little Williamsburg, VA.

He takes us on "daddy dates" on our birthdays.

He willingly lets us borrow money from him if we're ever in a pinch...and doesn't charge interest!

He mentors the son of close friend who passed away a couple months ago. Once a week, he invests in this young man who is trying to fulfill his father's legacy.

He surprises my mom by completely re-landscaping the yard when she goes out of town.

He has mastered living with four teenage daughters with a listening ear, kind words, many outfit appraisals, patience through the drama, and sympathy toward hormones.

He always gives second chances, and encourages us to do the same.

He makes the best nachos and the best waffles...but besides that, pretty much stays out of the kitchen.

He diligently throws the football, runs routes, and catches passes with my 15-year-old brother every chance he gets...soley because my brother dreams of being a quarterback and my dad knows it's his job to help him get there.

He prays. A lot. And he reads his Bible. Every night.

There is a saying, "it is much easier to become a father than to be one"

...becoming a father is natural, simple, and merely opens the door to the opportunity. But being a father - being a father requires one to handle that overwhelming challenge with grace, patience, and wisdom. Being a dad is being a hero. My dad has truly been a dad.

- d

ben rothwell

since I am quite fond of my boyfriend, and since I am aching to display some of my favorite parts about him, I am going to give a little "virtual tour," so to speak, of benjamin aaron rothwell.

things I love about b:

1) his unbelievable passion for worship and his ability to lead hearts through music.

2) the way he loves my sisters.

3) his eyes. oh yes, those dark eyes. clearly, they run in his family.

4) how cute he was when he was a little boy.

5) his knack for cooking always tastes good.

6) no one has ever looked so good in sunglasses.

7) he eats chipotle burritos with such urgency and satisfaction.

8) his horrendous facial expressions.

9) we like the same food, made the same way.

10) where he's come from and the journey he's traveled to be the man that he is today.

11) the way he looks at me -- that lingering gaze that displays even the corners of his heart.

12) his droid phone (no really, I love it) and his constant cup of coffee.

13) the way he makes me laugh -- so hard, so often.

14) he read twilight...and liked it.

15) he whistles whenever he's in a good mood.

16) the way he interacts with children.

17) he sings to/with me.

love has a name

"For the girl dressed in white, for the man who's lost his sight

When life's the question, love's the answer

For the poor nameless child, for lovers unreconciled

When life's the question, love's the answer

For a world lost in pain, know that love has a name

When life's the question, Jesus answers

with his love

Always waits, never lies, no disguise

...the love of Jesus"

introducing: aunt dedi

Even at four years old, I still had trouble talking. My older sister, Taylor-Lynn, was my faithful translator. If you were to meet me and ask me my name, I would gladly and confidently respond with, "dedi modo."

Two years ago, my mom had a baby. Unplanned. Number 10. I was 18 years old and graduating high school. I instantly fell in love with Anderson and prided myself on taking care of him. A couple months ago, he learned to say my name. "Dedi."

Now, I am an aunt. The AUNT of Gabriel Alexander Louis, born May 28th, 2010. My brother-in-law, Drew, has fittingly titled me "aunt dedi."

I am currently in Dallas, Texas, staying in the will-be nursery at Taylor and Drew's little house. The room is already decorated with little wooden "g's" that are standing up on his dark oak armoire. The closet is full of little infant onesies. The bathroom is complete with baby soap, baby washcloths, and baby powder.

The surroundings remind me of my new role and all the associated feelings:

I am proud - proud of my sister who endured 15 hours of labor, and who gave birth to gabriel naturally.

I am impressed - impressed that the girl who cried at bee stings and spankings could go through that excruciating pain for someone so small, yet so significant.

I am content - content watching drew's large hands hold his son while bending his 6'5" frame to whisper and sooth gabriel.

I am committed - committed to spoiling and fighting for this little boy.

I am anxious - anxious to see who he will become and what great things he will accomplish.

I am happy - happy for the Louis family which is forever changed and bettered.

I am confident - confident that they will be such extraordinary and rewarding parents.

I am compelled - compelled to hold him nonstop, sing to him, stare

at him, snuggle him, etc.

I am humbled - humbled by Taylor's selflessness.

I am convinced - convinced that those 10 little fingers and 10 little toes are evidence of God's ultimate masterpiece -- life.

I am inspired - inspired to start my own family one day, and become a mommy.

I am overwhelmed - overwhelmed with love for gabriel.

I am blessed - blessed because I get to be a part of his family, blessed because he will know me one day as someone who truly adores him, blessed to witness this miracle of life, and blessed to watch the miracle continue to unfold.

Welcome to the world, Gabriel, I promise to mother you a little -- and befriend you a lot.

- dedi

his love letter to me

My dad is the best man I know. He has always, always done right by my mom, and he has always, always done right by us. To me, that in itself shows more substantial character than pretty much anything else. And although he may be the best daddy in the world, he has still taught us that there is one better still: our heavenly father. Today mark morrow did what he always does on a sunday morning: he passionately spoke to his church. He talked about why God allows suffering and how God wants to see us use our hurt and pain to make us better, not bitter. I've been reading The Father's Love Letter and learning more about the character of God and his own perspective of me, his child. I have learned that while yes, people suffer and yes, I suffer, God has claimed himself the father who comforts me throughout all my troubles.

"God wants to pick you up, give you a hug and whisper your name in your ear. You are His child and He is your father. This is your destiny; this is what you were created for. When you let Him love you in this way, as a father loves his little child, you will begin to realize that the need for love and affirmation you had as a little child is still deep within you. When you allow yourself to be embraced by God, you begin to see that this is what you've been looking for all your life. You may have searched for it in your career, in a relationship, or in many other things, but you will find it only in one place - in the arms of your heavenly Father."

Lord, I pray that you would give me the grace to become more childlike. I want to lose myself in your unfailing love. Help me to walk in the simplicity of faith that allows me to trust you wholeheartedly for all my needs.

"God is the Father of compassion and of all comfort. When you need comfort most, he is faithful to be by your side through all your pain and disappointment. He weeps with you, and his heart breaks with yours. Your heavenly Father wants to hold your hand as you walk through the seasons in your life. You were never meant to shoulder these burdens on your own. God wants to comfort you with his tender love."

Lord, please heal, restore, and give favor. Thank you for staying true to all your promises -- promises to remain faithful, to hold me, to comfort me, and to love me. And the promise that you are my father. And I am your child.

I love you.

-d

"all that I'm after is a life full of laughter - as long as I'm laughin' with you"

Last weekend me and b.rothwell packed up and went driving. Our first stop was baltimore, maryland where we navigated (via ben's droid phone) to a tiny, quaint bar/venue for a miraculous dave barnes show. After sitting on bar stools and soaking in the musical goodness for three hours (and then meeting him!) we then continued our journey to pheonixville, pennsylvania for ben's best friend's college graduation.

here are some of my most favorite parts:

1. our competition.

2. our 'road trip' playlist...with all the good stuff.

3. all our pee stops where ben would visit the bathroom and I would wait in the car. (maybe I should be concerned that I don't pee enough?)

4. being thrifty by packing homemade sub sandwiches for the drive.

5. "I Have And Always Will" on the acoustic guitar embraced by the crowd's absolute stillness. Even the asians behind us stopped jabbering over their drinks long enough to witness the beauty, emotion, and delivery of this song.

6. Dave's obvious passion as he used about 10 minutes of his set to talk about the mocha club.

7. Steve moak's cover of miley cyrus mixed with don mclean.

8. Ben's constant attempts at earning "sweetie" stars...and his unwillingness to relinquish any stars to his poor girlfriend. Even when I begged, he would shrug and say, 'it's competition, baby'....a true testament to our relationship.

9. visiting "love park" in Philadelphia.

10. having ben wake me up each morning.

11. bringing books, magazines, etc. to pass the time in the car, but instead being content just to put the seat back, listen to music, and hold my boyfriend's hand.

12. chipotle pitstop, causing the GPS to redirect us using the scenic route. (only good things come from eating chipotle).

13. my new floral sundress and white coat -- compliments of the boyfriend.

14. antique jewelry shopping in the cute little downtown area.

15. learning an intense (yet entertaining/addicting) card game...and beating ben. :)

everything is beautiful

cotton fields,

the open road

the radio plays a song

we both know we don't sing along

- dave barnes

A few words on words

I spent today putting together a "quote book" for Talitha Adele's 21st birthday. I integrated and incorporated several (and I mean several) of my collected quotations. Excerpts from literature, lyrics from songs, bible verses, statements from musicians, philosophers, authors, my favorite tv show. It could be endless.

As I sat there flipping through the pages, I understood the purpose for this compilation. I realized the enormity of the mere words. I realized the impact in which they are capable. These chosen words...these words are for the loved, the unloved, the broken, the faithful, the faithless, the stumblers, the seekers, the hopeful, and the hopeless, the weak, the strong, the beautiful and the believers.

If these words could but touch the soul of someone who fits one of those descriptions (and truthfully we all have at some point), then these words have succeeded.

Words matter.

-d